


Unique

by writershapeholeonthedoor



Category: Person of Interest (TV)
Genre: Awkward Romance, Declarations Of Love, F/F, Gen, Idiots in Love, Love, Romance, shaw is a mistery only root can understand
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-04
Updated: 2019-08-04
Packaged: 2020-07-30 21:04:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20103604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/writershapeholeonthedoor/pseuds/writershapeholeonthedoor
Summary: There’s a long list of things Shaw won’t do.  And there’s a list of things only Shaw does.





	Unique

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Tumblr, @writershapeholeonthedoor, and send me prompts if you have any.  
Also, english is not my first language, so please let me know if there's anything wrong.

Sameen Shaw was not an easy woman to love. Root supposed she didn’t make things easier either, but, honestly, Shaw was the hard one. Not that Root was a relationship expert or anything – Shaw was her very first girlfriend – but she’d watched movies, she’s seen other couples, she kinda knew how it was supposed to go.

But dating Shaw was not like the movies she’d watched. For instance, Shaw was not up to send her flowers when they fought. Root always laughed out loud to the thought. Not that they had many fights, mainly discussions about silly things like numbers and missions, but buying her flowers was not something Shaw would ever do. While in the romantic big gestures list, she could also scratch the ‘run to stop her to catch a plane’. Shaw would run after numbers, killers, Bear, and literally anyone who pissed her off if she had to, but she wouldn’t, for sure, run through some crowded airport to make a declaration so Root wouldn’t leave or something like that.

Shaw also wouldn’t hold her hand in public. There would never happen a day where they would walk Bear in the park with interlaced fingers swinging between them. She also wouldn’t throw her arm around her shoulders or her waist – even if she does allows Root to do it to her sometimes. Shaw wasn’t a hugger either, especially if anyone was watching, but really she just doesn’t go around hugging Root if there wasn’t a reason to do it – birthdays and anniversaries, for example.

Root introduced her as her girlfriend whenever they were out, unless the missions wouldn’t allow it or if she was feeling particularly cheerful and wanted to screw her up a little bit by calling Shaw her wife. Shaw only waved at her general direction and said: “That’s Root”.

There also wouldn’t be date nights at expensive restaurants, picnics at the park, walking around the beach to watch the sunset, staying up until late to watch the stars, or waiting in line to watch a movie they both wanted to see. Shaw wasn’t that person, they didn’t have a date night every week or month – like Wednesday’s nights or Fridays. They also never had a trip to take a vacation together. They traveled a lot, but not on vacation, and never to rest.

Sameen Shaw doesn't say “I love you” either. Not once every week or ever really. Since they started to date – two years ago – she never said it. Even if Root said it every time before hanging up a call, or before they both closed their eyes to sleep, or every time they opened their eyes in the morning, or over their earpieces, impromptu during the day.

From the day they met in that apartment and Root held an iron very close to her face, the hacker knew Shaw was different. She knew that Shaw was smart, cunning, powerful, loyal, stubborn, hot head, whimsical. Unique, even. She slowly learned over the years that Shaw was broken, just like the rest of them, she was just better at hiding it. And that she could be soft, she could if she tried.

But she won’t say “I love you”.

Unlike everyone else might think, it didn’t bother Root. People could assume they say it every time, especially with everything they go through on a daily basis, that they would like to remind each other every day about how much they care or things like that. She was sure Fusco thought so, so did Reese, maybe even Harold.

But Shaw doesn't say it. Not like every other couple Root ever watched, not like Root thought was going to happen when she was an excited teenager. Because Shaw wasn’t like that. She was fierce, sincere, faithful, devoted to her beliefs, strong, incisive. Unique. Truly unique, there was no one else like her.

Shaw doesn’t send her flowers – she never would – but she sent her food more than once when Root was stuck in a mission. She sent her gun's magazines, even. She would never run after her in some airport, but she ran after her countless times to help her with a number or a mission, doesn't matter how dangerous it might be. And after they got a hold on their breath again, she would always give her a look, a glare, and say “I can run faster than you”.

They never held hands in public, but Shaw stopped growling when Root slides her arm around her shoulders – that wasn’t that often, because she knew Shaw don't enjoy it completely. She never reached out to hold her hand, but she reached out for her numerous times. A hand on the small of her back when they go inside somewhere, keeping her steady, or when they got out of anywhere. A poke on her ribs or shoulder to call her attention to something. A squeeze in her shoulder before she left. Strong hands holding her hips in place when they kissed.

So Shaw never called Root her 'girlfriend 'to anyone. She waves, points, or turns her chin in her direction, saying “that’s Root” or just “Root” or “Eeyone”. Root never cared that much, because that was better than the real name that she tried so much to forget. Shaw never said it, not even when people would give her weird looks when none of them prompted if that was her first or her last name. Not even if a brave one said “as short for what?” or “is it Ms. Root or...?” or “oh, okay, well, uh, cool”. And Shaw never denied when Root used the word ‘girlfriend’ – or ‘wife’, by the way – she just rolls her eyes or run her tongue through her teeth, but she never refutes it.

There also weren’t expensive restaurants, but there were pizza, Chinese, Thai, Japanese and Italian takeouts. Shaw usually looked like she wasn’t listening, but she always knew what to bring back home. And, when the money wasn’t short, she would invite Root to eat somewhere new – not they ever did anywhere new, because they both liked Dinno’s too much. No picnics at parks, but there was granola bars and Snickers on rooftops or behind trees while observing a number. No walks at the beach to see the sunset, but there were morning runs at crowded and loud New York’s streets. They wouldn’t waste time watching the stars when they could both be asleep to gave their well-deserved rest, neither they would leave their comfort to go watch a movie in a room filled with strangers. Root was good enough in her hacker skills to make their own house do the movies' part anytime Shaw ever showed any indication she might want to watch something other than random reality shows.

And vacation was not something the Machine gave, so they would grab a small break here and there when they have a chance at some hotel they’re following a number at or something like that. And since their schedule was so insane, there was no way they could draw a circle in every Wednesday in the calendar to mark it as their date night. They will leave the subway station at some crazy hours, look at each other, and just know where to go from there. If they were tired, or any of them was, they would walk home. If they weren’t, they would figure it out.

But Shaw doesn't say “I love you”.

She holds Root’s arm before the hacker run inside a building with guys armed until their teeth and says “if you die in there, I’m going to kill you, Root”. She traces Root’s scars when they’re naked in bed and whispers “it doesn't matter because they mean you fought back”. She scoffs when Root walks by to give her a kiss before leaving through the door and shouts “if you’re not here by nightfall, I’m going to get Bear and we will hunt you down”. She teases, challenges, and make snarky comments.

But Shaw doesn't say “I love you”.

Shaw watches her sleep sometimes when she can’t sleep herself and say “I’m glad I’m the only one who could kill you in your sleep” when Root catches her doing it. She raises her eyebrows and mock “are you sure you want to jump from this height?”. She steps in front of her if she feels any danger around and goes all “stay behind me, will you?”. Shaw also steps in front of her when the sun is shining straight at them – not that it actually helps since she’s so much shorter – and dares her to say anything about it with a glare only.

Sameen Shaw is insanely stubborn and hard-headed, but she’s also wildly passionate. They argue about the silliest things like why they should repaint the walls, or who should take Bear out to a run, or if they should invite the team to dinners at their apartment just because. Shaw hates to be proven wrong, she gets petulant and starts to mutter angry things under her breath, just like a child, but Root finds it adorable – especially because Shaw was never mad at her or called her a ‘smartass’ like everyone else used to do when she was a kid.

Their love is clear as daylight on a hot summer day. Root had said those three words countless times and Shaw never ignored it. She says “I know it”, or “sure”, or “crazy, indeed”, or “you sure?”, or “yes, well...”, or just a peck on her lips.

Root always scratched that as a stubborn Sameen Shaw way to be. She’s unique, she works in unique ways. Exclusive. Singular. Unprecedented. Root had looked for a lot of synonyms in the dictionaries to understand Shaw even before they got together, so it never surprised her for real.

But, one day, while spending the night in the subway with Reese while watching a number over the screens, Root just decided to ask. She felt, for the first time that maybe it was a weird thing, that maybe it wasn’t normal, that maybe it wasn’t okay.

“Does it even matter?” Reese had said, with an eye roll and a shrug. “She clearly loves you.” Reese was probably the only one, besides her, that could understand how Shaw’s mind worked most of the time.

“Yeah, I mean, I know she does.” Root was confident in her words. “But isn’t it a little... odd... that she’d never said it?”

Of course, that, if Reese could read Shaw, he also could read Root’s feelings all over her face. He knew, even if her confident façade was in place, that a small part of her was afraid she might be wrong. “If you think about it, no, it’s not.” He took a deep breath, looking around the desk they were leaning on like he was searching for something. “Think about it, Root.”

She half wanted to tell him she wasn’t feeling like thinking about anything, but they really didn’t have anything else to do while watching their number through the computers. So she did exactly that. Reese wasn’t really expecting her to talk again, but, eventually, Root gasped and he felt amused by it.

“So?”

“Fuck, John.” She rambled.

He nodded. “It’s my theory, you know, to be sure you should ask her, but I know if anyone asks they’re a dead person. Everyone, in the literal sense of the word, that she loved is gone now. Her father, her mother, her uncles, or whatever, everyone. There’s only one person left that she loves and that person runs around town holding a gun, chasing down some creepy dudes. Not the safest thing ever.” Reese shot her a grin, that surprised her a little. “She loves you, trust me. Maybe she doesn’t say it out loud now and maybe she never will, like superstition I guess. But she does, even if she doesn't say it.”

And she doesn't say “I love you”.

Instead, Shaw kisses her until Root can’t think anymore. She orders food to wherever the place Root is to make sure she will remember to eat. She tears off Root’s clothes and moans “mine” in her ear while taking her with a passion that never could stop Root’s mind of blowing away. And, in the morning, she kisses every bruise, hickeys, bites mark and scratch. She trains some commands with Bear so he’s always ready to save Root if needed. She sleeps in the side of the bed closest to the door, so she could stop anyone who tried to break in their studio apartment. She texts Root when she’ away so the hacker will remember to shut all windows and lock the door. She cleans Root’s wounds, even the smallest ones when she comes back from a mission.

Shaw gives her lectures about some medical terms when Root can’t sleep – because God knows how boring that could be. She brushes the hair from the hacker’s face when her head is resting on Shaw’s shoulder. She makes sure to put another milk box in the fridge when Root forgets to do it. She cleans Root’s guns, but stay away from her computers because she’s afraid to fuck them up.

Shaw doesn't say “I love you”. She says thing like “come back”, “be safe”, “don’t be reckless, you jerk”, “stay here”, “I will cover you”, “do you have your gun?”, “you can have my gun -and-“I’m glad”. Once, after finally giving up and letting Root buy a whiteboard to put behind the front door to leave small notes, Shaw even said “I want you to be happy” – “and if that stupid piece of shit is going to do make you shut up, fine, just take it” was the rest of the phrase Root pretended not to hear while squeaking to grab the thing they were fighting for weeks.

In the two years, they’ve been together, Shaw didn’t say “I love you” even once.

But, in those two years, there was not even a second where Root didn’t felt loved.


End file.
